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Self amusement:

"Isn't it true that if you walk far enough, you can walk off the earth?"
"Is that a real picture of Zeus?"
"The needle on my compass is broken... it keeps pointing in the same direction"
"So isn't, like, Greece, like, the country, like, that makes, like, the most, like, greasy food in, like, the world?"
"Didn't Jesus, like, turn bread into fish or something?"
"I'm trying to eat an orange right now but I can't peel it. My dad usually does it for me."
"Volcano insurance? Oh, like in case you get run over by a volcano!"
"Ohmygawd I panicked! At the disco way before you even got there."
Upon looking at the menu at a Seafood restaurant: "Razor Clams? Wouldn't that hurt to eat razors?"
"But if it's an arms race, but how will they run? On their hands?"
"Wasn't the Big Bang the thing that god used to kill the dinosaurs?"
"I love Europe. Its my most favorite country, right behind Italy."
"So, was the USSR like, a submarine?"
"Isn't England like floating on the sea, so like could you swim under it?"
"South Africa's not a country, you dumbass! It's a continent! God, you're stupid..."
slashed at 10:35 PM .